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Friday, January 18, 2019

There is such a thing as a free lunch

I wore a "parker green" belted bell-sleeve sheath sweater dress from New York and Company with "Tomalah Ombre Pumps" from Nine West. I accessorized with earrings, necklace and watch from Avon and a black satchel handbag from Jessica Simpson. I also wore a new hairdo: Noriko Reese in a shade of red called "Cherrywood."

It's always nice to feature something from Stana's mega-blog, Femulate.  I love her confidence and strength, and she looks great too!  Yes, she did get a free dinner, and she even had fun!

Thursday, January 17, 2019

Forwards... and backwards

The question then arising is this: why, in my twenties, when I’d lost some of my shyness and did have opportunities for intercourse, I didn’t take them. Something was ‘getting in the way’. Was it a trans persona breaking through to the surface, or was it that the habits of self-sufficiency developed early on had become second nature, leaving me permanently closed? The ‘otherness’ of other people – which I suspect for most folk lies at the heart of sexual attraction, even in same-sex relationships – for me was alienating.

We haven't heard from Dabrela in some time, but she makes up for it in this post.   Forwards... and backwards, the title of this post, nicely describes the thoughts that she is sharing with us.  It's an honest self assessment that many should relate to.  I'm sure she'd like to hear from readers, so feel free to say hi to Dabrela when you visit her blog by leaving a comment.


This post is linking to her final post, "Anniversary and end of an era ...", because, for some inexplicable reason, her blog won't accept comments anymore, and she richly deserves many. 

Two bloggers who have meant so much to me over the years have been Halle and Caroline.  In Halle's recent post, she links to a post, from Caroline, which may be her last.  From what Caroline has told me, she has lost most of the control over her blogger site and it no longer accepts comments.  Read more on Halle's post, and do comment.  If you have a fix for Caroline's blog, don't be shy! 

Tuesday, January 15, 2019

GRS – 3 Surgeries and One Beautiful Nightmare

I woke up groggy as all heck, keeping my eyes closed for a moment until I felt an intense pain and an awareness of beeping.  As soon as I opened my eyes, a kind consult came to me, explaining softly where I was, that everything had gone ok, and asked what my pain levels were.  I imagine I was slipping in and out of consciousness, perturbed only by the pain, moaning about how much it hurt and that the painkillers hadn’t taken effect yet

I love Amy's writing style.  While this post may not be all sugar and spice, it is a very good review of just what Amy has had to endure to become whole.  This is the second of a three part post.  If you missed her first post, she links to it in this one.

Sunday, January 13, 2019

Biological Sex and Transgender People

So you still think that sex or gender is a clear binary thing? What do you intend to do with every person who does not fit within a certain median percent that matches all your criteria? You don’t know who they are, and quite often they do not know themselves. Are you right in the middle, having tested your chromosomes, checked your physiology and come to a researched conclusion? Or might you be like a deeply racist person who discovers from their DNA that they are 30 per cent what they hate? What would you do if you discovered that you have mosaic chromosomes, for example (where you have both XX and XY  combinations in different cells)?

Biological Sex and Transgender People is a well thought out post, fro Andie.  The basic theme: Discrimination against those who are transgender.

Saturday, January 12, 2019


"As much as we'd like to be considered part of the club, the amount of acceptance by other women will always vary. Beyond that, their motives are not necessarily the same, either.

Good reading, from Cyrsti, with comments from Connie.  This post is not only about transwoman acceptance from cis-women but also acceptance from other transwomen.  Regarding the latter, Connie described some very ugly examples.

Friday, January 11, 2019

Reply to an Anonymous Comment

How about if the whole Trans thing is bullshit? How about if you walked away from it your life and hope within it improves? Just sayin...cuz I think that totally rubs you wrong. Cuz you’re SO invested in this notion. But...what if you’re wrong?

The anonymous reader had some good questions.  Likewise, the bogger had some good, well thought answers.  It's good reading, from Sophie.

Wednesday, January 9, 2019

I Am Too Old to Change!

Unless you have been there, it is hard to explain the imperative that drives those who transition. I had people tell me, when I tried to explain it to them, "You have lived this way all your life, so why can't you just do it a while longer? You don't have that much longer to live." That sort of response made it clear how impossible it was for them to grasp my situation. The fact is, the older I got the harder it became to suppress that drive. I cannot imagine what it would have been like to keep my life on hold for another year, never mind the rest of my life. 

What a fine blog post, from Halle.  She's telling us what we already know, but it doesn't hurt to hear it again from someone who's been there.

Another reason for reading this post, is Halle's comment, and link to, an article on living in fear of Dementia as a trans-person.  This is a topic I've never seen addressed.  Think about it.  Personally, having had a relative exit her life after a few years of this dreadful disease, I know that memories, especially the most recent, die long before the early memories of childhood.  The result could be that a transwoman, with Dementia, may at some point "forget" that she transitioned and what remains of her memories is her original life as a child or young adult growing up male.  Change the genders and the story could be the same for a transman.

Tuesday, January 8, 2019

Feminine Differential - The Agony of De'Feet

Let's talk about a problematic area of female presentation. Many venturing out feel their feet are large and see this as a negative to their overall presentation.

Rhonda discusses....well, let's just say "big feet".  You'd be surprised how many women have to deal with large shoes!

Sunday, January 6, 2019

Catch 22

Once you have lived many decades in a role that aligns with your birth sex, making any kind of announcement can be akin to throwing a live hand grenade into a room. Your family members may have had no inkling of your true identity and this feels to them like a betrayal. No one is more likely to feel this way than the spouse who thinks she knew her husband.

Joanna says it all, in that paragraph.  For more, go to Catch 22.

Thursday, January 3, 2019


And I find myself buoyed going into 2019, determined that I will kick this years' ass so hard, as I have many others before it. But right now, as 2019 starts, I find myself waiting. Once again I am waiting. Transition involves a lot of waiting. It is not an undertaking for the impatient. The current thing I'm waiting on are my surgery dates. 

And.....the wait is so frustrating for Faith.  What is she waiting for?  What surgery?  Read Waiting, to find out.

Wednesday, January 2, 2019

What? Hormones Were Life Changing?

The number one thing that changing my hormones did is it allowed me to accept who I am and go with it.  When I first decided to do this I had no intentions of going full time.  I never saw myself as actually being a woman.  I figured I would give hormones a shot and see if that would help with some concerns I had.  Now, after having been full time for about six months, and having been on estrogen since July 2017, I know I will never go back.  I can see now that hormones didn't make me want this, it allowed me to admit what has been there all along, I'm actually a woman.

In response to a question from Femulate's Stana, Nadine as written a wonderfully honest response.

Tuesday, January 1, 2019

All In Good Measure — A New Year Special

The new year for me is more about freedom, enjoying me, enjoying the female side whether it be clothes or inner personality, the stronger side of being female with achievement and self belief that would have once been associated with being masculine. Building on what happiness I found this year and improving how I spend that time. Finding adventure from time to time and not letting life just slip by in a typical British way.

I have probably said this before, but I just love the way this girl writes.  You read Hannah's words and you just want to run or bike with her and share journeys with her.  Her writing makes it seem like she is a friend to all of us.  I featured last year's New Year post from Hannah (on the right of this page) and she's outdone herself with another winner this year.  Happy New Year, Hannah!

Genuine trans women II

Those seeking to inspire fear and hatred of trans women, or to justify their own, suggest we don’t have surgery, and that having a penis in some way makes us dangerous. Well, in a loo you don’t expose your crotch until you are safely in a cubicle, where no-one can see, so it hardly matters there. It only matters to us and to our sexual partners. But I’d thought I’d check. How likely is it that a trans woman has had surgery?

Clare comments on the subject, quoting some facts and figures in the UK.

The People - Personal Thoughts

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