#NotSafeToBeMe

It’s time for this government to ban Conversion Therapy for everyone.
 

 

 

 

This post, from Lynn, is directed towards the UK government but really applies to all governments (mine - USA - included).

Thank you, Lynn, for posting! 

Art

I've got to apologize for the infrequent posts in the past few months and also for not replying to emails.  I've been extremely busy with work and work-related travel.

With that said, I thought I'd share a post from several years ago, along with some follow-up thoughts.

The original post was part of a "Thoughts and Reflections" series of guest posts, we did in 2010.  You can still find those posts on T-Central.  One of the guests posts was from someone I simply identified as "A".  Today, I can identify him as Art. 

When I was actively blogging via my Calie's Chronicles blog, Art would often reply to my blog posts via private emails.  He shared much of his life with me and I found that we had much in common in the way of career and hobbies.  For some reason, Art felt very comfortable sharing his life and very private thoughts with me.  While he never gendered himself as female, Art was clearly trans and if he were growing up in today's world, Art would have definitely transitioned from male to female. 

But Art never grew up in today's world.  When we were sharing emails, he mentioned to me that he was 90 years old.  I enjoyed our email exchanges and it felt good in that I was an outlet for him....a way for him to share this dark secret he had kept for so many years.

After several years of exchanging emails, I stopped hearing from Art.  I wrote him a few times, but never received a reply.

About five years after the last email from Art, I received an email from his son who informed me that Art had passed away.  His son had discovered the emails Art and I had exchanged and was absolutely astonished to discover that his father had kept this secret from the family all of these years.  It's really too bad since his son was extremely understanding and specifically wrote me to say thanks for allowing his father to feel comfortable enough to discuss his feelings with me.

It's been many years since I received that email from Art's son.  It meant a lot to me to get some closure and also to hear that Art's son was so accepting of his father's deep secret.

Today, I want to re-post the original guest post, along with my introduction, which dates back 12 years ago.

 

Imagine, if you will, that the year is 1937. You're 17 years old and have feelings that your gender and sex do not match. What would you have done? How would you have reacted?

I suppose for some that suicide was an option. Others may have suppressed it while living very frustrated lives.

Gender reassignment surgery was (with one exception) unheard of at the time.

Per the Andrology website:

"Much as it might have been desired by patients thus afflicted, hormonal and surgical gender reassignment were impossible until the thirties of this century. Modern documented history of transsexualism and gender reassignment starts in 1930 with the first recorded adult sex change operation on a Danish artist in Germany. Einar Wegener became Lily Elbe."

After that, it was only in 1953 with the story of the surgical gender reassignment of the American ex-GI George Jorgensen, who became Christine Jorgensen, that transsexualism received worldwide publicity.

"A" didn't have to imagine what it was like to be 17 years old in the year, 1937. He lived it and he had to also live with "it", although he didn't know at the time that "it" would be referred to as gender identity disorder many years later.

"A" sent me an email some time ago, as the result of a guest post I did on Lori's (former) blog. Although clearly transgender, he always has referred to himself in the male persona, as I am referring to him now.

I asked "A" to share his thoughts and reflections on transitioning and he sent me a draft. I was somewhat concerned with a paragraph near the end of the draft, because it referred to me. I told him that this was his essay and it should not be about me and asked him to delete the paragraph. He insisted it stay. At the end of his essay, I have included his reply and the reason why.

- Calie

The View From The Mountain Top

Hello friends,

Calie has asked me if I could express my thoughts on the subject of transitioning of gender. I am strongly in favor of transitioning as early in life as possible, with some caveats.

That being said, may I introduce myself. I am a man, age 90. Old enough, and with much experience (not all good). My childhood was spent in the 1920's, and my youth in the '30s. And more than that, I was born with an apparently serious case of Gender Identity Disorder.

In those days, total ignorance reigned, nobody - the doctor, the teacher, the lawyer, the clergy, the press, had ever heard of transsexualism, its problems, its causes, its treatment. Add to the problem the fact that my father was a Baptist Minister, bed rock. A really good man, kind and giving, but he knew Sin when he saw it, and Sin had invaded his family. My weakness had to be removed, and it was up to me to do it, with lots of help. I lived a life of hell, for I was effeminate.

Obviously, after years of pressure, I ended up believing everything they said, and buried my other self deep in my psyche, hardly ever to appear. There was great sinful pleasure when it did, soon to be again submerged. A huge Depression, and the stress of a great War overwhelmed me, still without recourse for the TS within, then college, a profession, marriage, and an interesting career. I learned to cope with my 2 persona's by deeply burying one.

Christine Jorgenson, six years my junior, completed transition in the mid 1950's. Then, close to 40, I was appalled, confused, and didn't realize that it might apply to me.

So, I never transitioned, and I have lived a life of deep, constant, frustration. It forced me to concentrate on my sciences. It created a strong and helpful drive that relieved that constant pressure, resulting in needed fulfillment as a creative engineer. I am probably the last articulate survivor from that infinity of earlier generations of humans, and the millions of TS people who were denied transition in the past. Obviously they all lived out their lives, as I did, the difference is that now you have a choice, we didn't. There is much pain either way one chooses, and I don't know which is worse. But, now you have a life choice, and it's a tough one.

In the mid 1990's I retired, discovered the Internet, and began to uncover my secret, which soon came alive, then overwhelmed me. She talks to me many times a day, a welcome joy. I follow many blogs, read much, but have done nothing to adapt. My wife, 87 years old, & my children, know none of it and sadly would absolutely reject me. It's too late in life for me to take the five years needed to modify my being, and at great cost too, to reappear in preferred form at age 95, given that I did live that long.

I am much hurt by the terrible fate awaiting many transitioning transsexuals. Many, many, have to become prostitutes to survive. The extremely high level of unemployment, and the desperate living standards of many are deplorable. The answer is money, and gaining the skill to obtain it, and that means much pre-transition planning, and getting the education to survive. I am appalled by the innocent, ignorant, young people starting transition with no hint of the horrors ahead, and no plan. They should make sure that they will be relatively safe and, without resources, they are in much danger.

I believe Calie to be a blessed and wonderful human being for rejecting transitioning to preserve her marriage and family. She suffers terrible frustration for it, but her love for them makes her do it, an extraordinary sacrifice. A tough, painful, responsible, and humane decision. Her wife must be a wonderful person.

Thanks for putting up with me. I love you all, and respect you.

- A

[When I asked "A" to delete the second to the last paragraph, this was his reply:

I mention at the essay beginning that I was strongly in favor of transitioning, but added that it was with caveats. The second caveat offered, not directly described, is that the crucial social consequences of transition should be recognized and accommodated when making the decision. I do not present that specifically, for it is too preachy, but I did praise the selfless decision of a person with full blown GID, who put transition aside out of love for wife and family. That person happened to be you, sorry, but the case remains important and valid, and should be strongly stated. Please don't invalidate the issue by weakening the example to cover your modesty.

Both the caveats could stand much more stress, but this is not the place.]

‘Gender critical’ author says she wants to ‘reduce’ number of trans people

Helen Joyce still pretends to care about trans people, but only in the sense they are seen as  deluded cis people who are suffering from the effects of transgender propaganda. As such they have become a burden to cis society.

Ummm.......Seriously?  Trans Express includes a link to the original post, on Pink News.