Not A Life Choice – Babies

Many transgender women have issues with not ever being able to carry a baby or experience giving birth. For many, seeing a pregnant woman serves as a reminder and causes some depression. I recall as a child pretending my belly had a baby in it.



This is a touching and well thought out post, from Emma.

Don’t have GRS

At the time I changed my name and went full time, I was ambivalent about surgery, but a year later I passionately wanted it. Why would you want surgery? I believe I wanted it at the time because I wanted social acceptance, or possibly to accept myself. Where a person male by genes gonads and genitals wants to dress as a woman, there were two categories they could fit- transvestite and transsexual. The transvestite is considered to be a sexual fetishist, which I found unattractive, but the transsexual had a medical condition, which I found more congenial.


The last two T-Central featured posts were based on very successful transitions.  One from Halle, who has transitioned, and the other from The Transgentle Wife, the spouse of one who has transitioned.

This post is from Clare Flourish who has regrets.  It is important to read both sides.  

I will add that I know many who have transitioned and are happy and I know some who are not.  In all cases, it seems that the lack of love in the life of those with regrets, or the lack of a job, is often the case.  

Clare mentioned in a comment to her post that there is pressure to physically transition.  I have seen this and know several who gave in to that pressure.  Some are happy.  Some are not.  Clare is one of my favorite bloggers.  She is just lovely in her pictures and I do hope things will turn around for her.  

Change

As I reflect over the last six years, I am realizing more and more what a big deal my husband’s transition from male to female has been, and what a big deal it is that we are still happily married and about to celebrate our 34th wedding anniversary. It’s also a big deal that we laugh more, we don’t sweat the small stuff, and we have way more good days than not. The days of sadness and frustration are few and far between.




This is a lovely post, written on the sixth anniversary of her husband's gender confirmation surgery.  And, The Transgentle Wife is going to start blogging again! We're looking forward to many more posts from her.

Every Day Is A Gift

This isn't an advice column, so what I'm about to do goes a bit against the grain, but here it is, for what it is worth - 

 
 

 

 

 

This is just a wonderful post from, my friend, Halle.  Her advice is about transitioning.  You're going to want to read her advice and, after doing so, go back through her blog and see just how her life as evolved since Halle started the blog in 2010.  She's happy now, and I love that for her.  Here's a taste, pre-transition, of when Halle's gender dysphoria and life in general had her pondering "Fear or Love".  How life has changed for Halle, and that's a good thing.

My Triggers

.......all of my life CDing was an impulse, nothing joyful or happy.  It was never at all satisfying.  I hated it and I hated myself when I succumbed.  It was never, ever complete.  It could be simply wearing a bra.  It might have been getting completely dressed, covered with my then voluminous body hair, and dressed only from the neck down.  I looked ridiculous and felt the same.  Shame and guilt, always.  I have now experienced more joy and happiness in one day dressed then I had in the previous, almost 50 years doing so.




So what are Kandi's "triggers"?  Are they also yours?  Good post, from Kandi's Land.

10 years with Crossdreamers!

The Crossdreamers blog was founded 10 years ago this day. Here's to the next 10!

The first post on this blog was posted on August 24 2008.  

Congratulations to Jack Molay for one of the finest transgender blogs on the planet!  In this post, Jack tells you how it started and where it's going.

Bathroom anxieties: a genderqueer janitor’s perspective

As a genderqueer person, I have never stressed out about where I was going to go pee.  Never, until this summer.  All bathrooms are out of commission except for one girls gang bathroom and one boys gang bathroom.




JQ's place of work is a school with many restroom options, including several "gender-neutral" bathrooms....usually.  Not this summer, however.  So, which did he choose?  Go here to find the answer in one of JQ's always interesting and well thought out posts.

Desperate for the knife, but not where you’d think

During the conversation with the girls yesterday evening I had cemented in my own mind something which I had been considering for a while, my intent to get a toe (and associated Metatarsil) removed from each foot, and I told him this was what I wanted done.



The conversation, above, was with Tish's doctor.  The whole idea gives me the chills, but I have relatively small feet. I'm also very open minded when it comes to ways to reduce the effects of gender dysphoria.  To read the doctor's reply, go to Desperate for the knife, but not where you’d think.

Treatment Journal Entry #2

If you have an untreated eating disorder or a close friend/family member of yours has one, please know that there is hope and things can get better. Unfortunately so many of us need to seek out therapy and treatment before that can happen but it does happen. If you or they live in MN, PA, OH, or WA I definitely recommend the Emily Program their website is https://www.emilyprogram.com/ and they have some really great resources for everyone at https://www.emilyprogram.com/resources/links



Despite the fact that Emmz gave T-Central one of the nicest shout-outs I've seen (😊), I did want to feature this post which is a followup to a post featured a few days ago.  It's about eating disorders and, yes, transwoman can have eating disorders.  This one is 3,000 words, by Emmz' count, so grab a cup of whatever to sip on while you read.

Here comes the juicy bit, the T part, the warning… If you are going to Transition M2F I would suggest  taking advantage of all that unwanted testosterone by burning up any anger doing heavy garden work while you can.




I'm not sure if my friend, Caroline, wrote this to be silly, but it did make me smile when I read that statement.  For Caroline, that horrible Testosterone, that can do so much permanent damage to the body of a male-to-female transitioner, was been greatly reduced following her transition.  I'm sure many would give up the heavy duty garden work just to get rid of the T!

All Are Welcome in Hastings……(unless you’re transgender)

The writers believe there is one group covered under the “all are welcome here” credo that shouldn’t really be welcomed: transgender folks.









Oh.....My.....God!  Read more, from Hannah.

Another Study On Detransition

Their bias of “non-homosexual male-to-females” showed itself when…

The less favourable outcomes of the nonhomosexuals carry significant implications for clinical practice. If considered eligible for SR, non-homosexuals should be able to receive additional guidance in coping with adverse consequences, such as a more troubled psychological functioning, or a more critical environment.

Translated: “OMG they are going to be lesbians!”



Diana has shared the abstract of this study and throws in a few of her own comments.

Treatment Journal Entry #1

I have been working with a therapist, a dietician, and attending group therapy for LGBTQ people



After reading the quote above, from this post, you're probably wondering why.  The answer is not pretty and brutally honest, from Emmz.  You're going to want to read this post and leave a comment.

Winner!

Perhaps you have read or heard of Christine Hallquist. To refresh your memory, she won the Vermont primary, becoming the first transgender woman to win a major party nomination for a state governor.






Politics aside, winning the Democratic nomination for governor of the state of Vermont is another milestone for the trans community.  Read, Winner!, from Cyrsti's blog, for the details.

Pushy Deadnaming

‘It’s rude to ask a trans person their old name. We call it deadnaming.’







Yes it is rude!  But, when the question comes from a therapist, it's beyond rude.   Read about it, in Heather's words, here.

Therapy Talk

You're worthless, useless, ugly, disgusting, and unwanted.











Sophie has experienced transphobia at its worst.  She needs a hug. 

Read this post and then this post to catch up.

straight jacketed

There is nothing new to learn but rather it is about allowing behavior and mannerisms which had been allowed to atrophy to surface. Once I gave myself permission to be feminine it just sprang forth on its own and it was only the elimination of the shame which facilitated it.



I just love this paragraph, from Joanna's post, straight jacketed.  Joanna has removed the straight jacket.  Alas, mine is just partly removed.

SEVENTY AND EXCITED

I celebrated my 70th birthday (August 4th). I've been on earth for seven decades! I have seen a lot, done many things, faced difficult challenges. I'm bullish about the future.






Go to this post and wish Genevieve a happy 70'th.  And, she is now into 18 years of blogging; one of the longest running blogs listed on T-Central.  

The Second Train

Over in the Chameleons milabox, we recently received an email from a media company, TellyJuice, about a short documentary they'd made.

 I found it moving, deeply personal, sensitive, and beautifully filmed. While it brought forth a tear, I think that was bittersweet: I was happy that they'd made it. Happy that they had found themselves and found the courage and support to make the journey they needed. Maybe it's never too late to get another train, whatever your preferred destination.



Lynn has linked to a really well done, and emotional, video featuring transwomen finding their feminine voices.  The video was taken at the Charing Cross Gender Identity Clinic, in London.  Thank you, Lynn, for sharing.

May You Find Peace

I have made peace with myself, and can no longer in good faith leave or recommend the content I once posted here.  Those writings were my best desperate hopes at the time, when I feared I might be something more that just dressing and was in denial.




I've found that reading other blogs better helps me to understand myself.  This post, while very short, really says a lot.  I don't know this blogger's name, but I do want to thank her for this post.

Don’t out anyone

Should it be a criminal offence to out someone? It is, in the UK, subject to an unlimited fine, in certain circumstances.







Good job, UK!  No one has been prosecuted yet, but it's the law in the United Kingdom.  Nothing like this in the USA that I'm aware of.  Thanks to Clare for posting this.