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Sunday, November 27, 2022


So there I was, sitting at the bar, when a man came up and said, "Hi, I'm bisexual. Let me 'bi' you a drink and then we can get sexual."


Love this post!  Sue speaks her mind, and does it well!  How did she address the comment, above?  Go to Pests, for the answer.


Saturday, November 26, 2022

The Conversation

I took the chance to tell him how much I appreciated his family accepting me Their support certainly softened the blow of losing any support I expected from my brother. 

This is one of those "feel-good" blog posts that I love.  In this one, Cyrsti has a nice, and long awaited, chat with her daughter's husband.  It was a good time for it too, when family gets together for the American Thanksgiving holiday.

Thursday, November 24, 2022

Lisa’s Night Out

.......a “Squeegee Kid” ran out and began to clean the windshield. That kid sure got more than he bargained for when he walked round to the side window and saw the “girl” driver with the long gams and tight dress pulled all the way up over her thighs!



This is a guest post on Kandi's blog, from Lisa, in Toronto.  She writes about a night out, in downtown Toronto, with her wife and a bunch of like-minded friends.  Nice post, Lisa!

Sunday, November 20, 2022

I Used to do Things, Now I Dilate

So if between here and there, somehow magically I do in fact end up with this fantasy vagina you speak of, then sure, yeah, I’ll dilate it. I’ll dilate the hell out of it. But I didn’t really think of that in practical daily terms. Possibly the first real thing was when I was sitting in my surgeon’s office and his amazing assistant Debbie tells me that I’m going to need to take off work for the next four months, primarily so that I can stick to the dilation schedule. Um, wait what? It’s going to be that involved?

I've read many blog posts involving dilating following GCS, but this one, from Kelly, really says it all, in easy to understand words.

Saturday, October 29, 2022

Stephanie's bra fitting

This time we are going to hear from Stephanie about her bra fitting at Marks & Spencer's here in the UK.



This is a guest post, from Stephanie, on Andrea's blog.  It's an awesome post about an awesome bra fitting experience.  Oh, if it were only like this everywhere!  Stephanie did everything right by freely identifying herself as a crossdresser.  If you're brave enough to go for a bra fitting (and not like me, since all of mine are via on-line ordering), do read this post.

Thanks to Lynn Jones for suggesting I feature this post.

Saturday, October 22, 2022

Leggy distractions

My legs are short and my skin is imperfect therefore my hosiery is important to me to make me look good.


Sue has a few words (and a nice photo) on tights and hose.

Tuesday, October 18, 2022

John Oliver - Attack On Trans Rights

The Last Week Tonight host looks at the extraordinary legal attack on trans rights in the US and conservative disinformation around gender-affirming care.



This is a re-post, from The Guardian.  Thanks to Rhonda for sharing.

Tuesday, October 11, 2022

Awareness Matters

We don't really talk about this in the trans community, but we really need to be doing that. We need to be taking the same care and caution that our cis sisters take because the risk is real.



Just what is our blogger referring to in the quote, above?  Go here to find out.

Sunday, October 9, 2022


There do seem to be people out there who take pleasure in seeking out and outing Trans people, and it's certainly made me think about what I share online.

Chloe has a few things to say about those who fight for women's rights yet have no respect for trans rights.

Friday, September 23, 2022

Educating my Dermatologist on Gender Dysphoria

But my dermatologist didn’t know any of this. She just knew the typical outsider viewpoint, ‘he was a he, and now I have to remember to properly call him a her, oh here is my chance, yay I didn’t mess up his pronouns.’ Okay, yes, I don’t know for a fact that is what happens in cis people’s brains, but I highly suspect it is something along those lines.


You're going to have to read Kelly's whole post to understand the comment, above, but the title of her post is a hint.  What this girl went through with her therapist was just devastating.  Go here to read the post.

Friday, September 16, 2022

You’d Be A Lot Cuter If You…

In male mode, I am aware of when I say something the person I am speaking to not only listens to what I am saying but they are also considering that a masculine presenting person is saying it to them. If I am describing something to a feminine presenting person I choose my words very carefully so she hopefully doesn’t feel I am manspaining it to them.




You can complete the sentence in the title with "smile".  This really great post goes well beyond that, however.  I consider it one of those "must reads".....perhaps because I so relate to it.

Wednesday, September 7, 2022

Points of Light

I spotted a woman standing in front of me, she had a short ponytail and just as it dropped away to it’s ends it had a dash of blonde highlight lines. It almost looked like a previous colour being grown out because there was so little left.



When Emilia described the bit of blonde and the end of the woman's ponytail, her friend said, “That sounds like a Balayage.”  So that's what it's called!  Emilia liked the idea and gave it a try on her own long hair.  Read Points of Light, to see how it turned out.


Sunday, September 4, 2022

Ghosts of the past

There are times when it feels a strange thing to be a blogger. To be someone who writes and shares what they do and who they are. Occasionally, these can be very personal moments.



I have followed Lynn's blog for about as long as she's been writing.  I've loved her sense of style, her sense of humor and her support of her local trans group and the trans community.  I've also greatly respected her love of family. 

I have sensed, however, that some of her posts, as of late, have been a bit dark. There's nothing wrong with that.  Looking back at my own blog, there have been numerous dark posts but it was my way of working through my own demons.  More importantly, Lynn's current post, gives us an insight on just how she keeps herself "grounded" by going back through her own writing over the years to revisit the good times and the not so good times and perhaps making her realize that life in 2005 is really not that much different from life in 2022.

Tuesday, August 30, 2022

Have you had bottom surgery yet?

Have you had bottom surgery yet? If not, is that something you are wanting to do? 


From my point of view, this is rather personal question from a reader, but this trans-guy, from Canada, does address the question.

Sunday, August 28, 2022

Jumping With Joy

Jumpsuits. I find them interesting. I've never worn one and always wanted the experience. So when I spotted a cheap one in a thrift-store I thought "Finally! My chance!"



Woman's jump suits are just lovely and sexy.  Our blogger just got her first and has included some photos so we can all see just how fab she looks in it.


Tuesday, August 16, 2022

That Letter To My Wife

Some suggested that I write a letter to my wife as a means of reconnecting with her. I thought long and hard about what I would write. A letter can be a wonderful way of expressing yourself if you take time and you can find the right words.   This unfortunately all goes to waste if the intended recipient does not want to read it.



Jenny did write the letter and has shared it with us.

Wednesday, August 10, 2022

They like us really

Generally speaking, when out and about I have had more support than abuse from the public; online I have found transphobia to be fairly rare. Of course, I am very alert to the possibilities of its cropping up anywhere, especially with such a hate-driven family as mine, but it does seem to me that the number of people who are prepared to dedicate a significant proportion of their lives to causing trouble to us is pretty small.


A very nice and positive post, from Sue.

Sunday, July 31, 2022

Project 'Long Hair' Update

My Wife has been giving me little reminders that I need to do something with my hair now it's longer.  She hasn't asked me to get it cut short but she says it needs styling. 


An update on how Charlotte is doing with her longer, and still growing, hair. 

Friday, July 29, 2022

Happiness Without Transitioning?

A popular narrative in the transgender community is that “a transgender person must transition – that it is matter of life and death. If you don’t agree, then you are less than…”




This is a guest post, on Stana's Femulate blog.  The author, Paula Gaikowski, has a lot to say, in a relatively short post.

Thursday, July 14, 2022

Reflections on a One Year Anniversary

I’ve said in the past that I’ve found now that I don’t “need” to add blog posts as frequently as I did in the beginning, that as I can now express myself more freely, that other outlet is not so much required. I’ve now found that to be true for taking and posting photos.


It's been a year since Michelle presented as male in the workplace.  Go here for her update.

Tuesday, July 5, 2022

Just Be

I suppose there will always be a point in life where the gender identity will not be a progression thing anymore, it’ll just – be. May be that’s where I am with it. May be I should just be.






I want to introduce a new blog, from a long-time blogger.  Perhaps you will recognize her writing style.  Enjoy Emilia's new blog and be sure to add a comment.

Wednesday, June 29, 2022


It’s time for this government to ban Conversion Therapy for everyone.




This post, from Lynn, is directed towards the UK government but really applies to all governments (mine - USA - included).

Thank you, Lynn, for posting! 

Saturday, June 18, 2022


I've got to apologize for the infrequent posts in the past few months and also for not replying to emails.  I've been extremely busy with work and work-related travel.

With that said, I thought I'd share a post from several years ago, along with some follow-up thoughts.

The original post was part of a "Thoughts and Reflections" series of guest posts, we did in 2010.  You can still find those posts on T-Central.  One of the guests posts was from someone I simply identified as "A".  Today, I can identify him as Art. 

When I was actively blogging via my Calie's Chronicles blog, Art would often reply to my blog posts via private emails.  He shared much of his life with me and I found that we had much in common in the way of career and hobbies.  For some reason, Art felt very comfortable sharing his life and very private thoughts with me.  While he never gendered himself as female, Art was clearly trans and if he were growing up in today's world, Art would have definitely transitioned from male to female. 

But Art never grew up in today's world.  When we were sharing emails, he mentioned to me that he was 90 years old.  I enjoyed our email exchanges and it felt good in that I was an outlet for him....a way for him to share this dark secret he had kept for so many years.

After several years of exchanging emails, I stopped hearing from Art.  I wrote him a few times, but never received a reply.

About five years after the last email from Art, I received an email from his son who informed me that Art had passed away.  His son had discovered the emails Art and I had exchanged and was absolutely astonished to discover that his father had kept this secret from the family all of these years.  It's really too bad since his son was extremely understanding and specifically wrote me to say thanks for allowing his father to feel comfortable enough to discuss his feelings with me.

It's been many years since I received that email from Art's son.  It meant a lot to me to get some closure and also to hear that Art's son was so accepting of his father's deep secret.

Today, I want to re-post the original guest post, along with my introduction, which dates back 12 years ago.

 Transgender flag - Wikipedia

Imagine, if you will, that the year is 1937. You're 17 years old and have feelings that your gender and sex do not match. What would you have done? How would you have reacted?

I suppose for some that suicide was an option. Others may have suppressed it while living very frustrated lives.

Gender reassignment surgery was (with one exception) unheard of at the time.

Per the Andrology website:

"Much as it might have been desired by patients thus afflicted, hormonal and surgical gender reassignment were impossible until the thirties of this century. Modern documented history of transsexualism and gender reassignment starts in 1930 with the first recorded adult sex change operation on a Danish artist in Germany. Einar Wegener became Lily Elbe."

After that, it was only in 1953 with the story of the surgical gender reassignment of the American ex-GI George Jorgensen, who became Christine Jorgensen, that transsexualism received worldwide publicity.

"A" didn't have to imagine what it was like to be 17 years old in the year, 1937. He lived it and he had to also live with "it", although he didn't know at the time that "it" would be referred to as gender identity disorder many years later.

"A" sent me an email some time ago, as the result of a guest post I did on Lori's (former) blog. Although clearly transgender, he always has referred to himself in the male persona, as I am referring to him now.

I asked "A" to share his thoughts and reflections on transitioning and he sent me a draft. I was somewhat concerned with a paragraph near the end of the draft, because it referred to me. I told him that this was his essay and it should not be about me and asked him to delete the paragraph. He insisted it stay. At the end of his essay, I have included his reply and the reason why.

- Calie

The View From The Mountain Top

Hello friends,

Calie has asked me if I could express my thoughts on the subject of transitioning of gender. I am strongly in favor of transitioning as early in life as possible, with some caveats.

That being said, may I introduce myself. I am a man, age 90. Old enough, and with much experience (not all good). My childhood was spent in the 1920's, and my youth in the '30s. And more than that, I was born with an apparently serious case of Gender Identity Disorder.

In those days, total ignorance reigned, nobody - the doctor, the teacher, the lawyer, the clergy, the press, had ever heard of transsexualism, its problems, its causes, its treatment. Add to the problem the fact that my father was a Baptist Minister, bed rock. A really good man, kind and giving, but he knew Sin when he saw it, and Sin had invaded his family. My weakness had to be removed, and it was up to me to do it, with lots of help. I lived a life of hell, for I was effeminate.

Obviously, after years of pressure, I ended up believing everything they said, and buried my other self deep in my psyche, hardly ever to appear. There was great sinful pleasure when it did, soon to be again submerged. A huge Depression, and the stress of a great War overwhelmed me, still without recourse for the TS within, then college, a profession, marriage, and an interesting career. I learned to cope with my 2 persona's by deeply burying one.

Christine Jorgenson, six years my junior, completed transition in the mid 1950's. Then, close to 40, I was appalled, confused, and didn't realize that it might apply to me.

So, I never transitioned, and I have lived a life of deep, constant, frustration. It forced me to concentrate on my sciences. It created a strong and helpful drive that relieved that constant pressure, resulting in needed fulfillment as a creative engineer. I am probably the last articulate survivor from that infinity of earlier generations of humans, and the millions of TS people who were denied transition in the past. Obviously they all lived out their lives, as I did, the difference is that now you have a choice, we didn't. There is much pain either way one chooses, and I don't know which is worse. But, now you have a life choice, and it's a tough one.

In the mid 1990's I retired, discovered the Internet, and began to uncover my secret, which soon came alive, then overwhelmed me. She talks to me many times a day, a welcome joy. I follow many blogs, read much, but have done nothing to adapt. My wife, 87 years old, & my children, know none of it and sadly would absolutely reject me. It's too late in life for me to take the five years needed to modify my being, and at great cost too, to reappear in preferred form at age 95, given that I did live that long.

I am much hurt by the terrible fate awaiting many transitioning transsexuals. Many, many, have to become prostitutes to survive. The extremely high level of unemployment, and the desperate living standards of many are deplorable. The answer is money, and gaining the skill to obtain it, and that means much pre-transition planning, and getting the education to survive. I am appalled by the innocent, ignorant, young people starting transition with no hint of the horrors ahead, and no plan. They should make sure that they will be relatively safe and, without resources, they are in much danger.

I believe Calie to be a blessed and wonderful human being for rejecting transitioning to preserve her marriage and family. She suffers terrible frustration for it, but her love for them makes her do it, an extraordinary sacrifice. A tough, painful, responsible, and humane decision. Her wife must be a wonderful person.

Thanks for putting up with me. I love you all, and respect you.

- A

[When I asked "A" to delete the second to the last paragraph, this was his reply:

I mention at the essay beginning that I was strongly in favor of transitioning, but added that it was with caveats. The second caveat offered, not directly described, is that the crucial social consequences of transition should be recognized and accommodated when making the decision. I do not present that specifically, for it is too preachy, but I did praise the selfless decision of a person with full blown GID, who put transition aside out of love for wife and family. That person happened to be you, sorry, but the case remains important and valid, and should be strongly stated. Please don't invalidate the issue by weakening the example to cover your modesty.

Both the caveats could stand much more stress, but this is not the place.]

Saturday, June 4, 2022

‘Gender critical’ author says she wants to ‘reduce’ number of trans people

Helen Joyce still pretends to care about trans people, but only in the sense they are seen as  deluded cis people who are suffering from the effects of transgender propaganda. As such they have become a burden to cis society.

Ummm.......Seriously?  Trans Express includes a link to the original post, on Pink News.

Wednesday, May 25, 2022


This morning on a couple of my social media accounts, I noticed two transgender women thinking about reversing all the time and effort they had put into transitioning into the feminine world. To coin an old term, I was in "shock and awe" they would even consider such a move. 


While some do de-transition, Cyrsti is not one of them.  Excellent post!

Friday, May 20, 2022

Last Post

I am now starting to disperse of some of those token objects that I foolishly once coveted and to say my final good byes. 






I'm a week late in posting this.  I didn't see any comments, so I thought I'd feature it.  Honestly, I'm not sure just what Jacklyn is trying to tell us.  Is it a trans purge or a life purge?  I do hope it's not the latter.  I've seen too much of that over the years.  Nevertheless, she is telling us it is her Last Post.

Sunday, May 15, 2022

How To Be More Feminine...

As people continue to realize that gender norms are a little outdated, we now think that being feminine is more of a style choice (although positive feminine traits are still good to emulate).



Ever the stylist, Rhonda offers some good advice in a short post.

Tuesday, May 3, 2022

Language matters

If women aren't "crossdressing" when they wear traditionally male clothing, why is a male bodied person doing so when wearing a skirt?


It's a good question.  A short post, from Joanna.

Saturday, April 30, 2022

Why Having a Crossdressing Husband is the Most Stressful Thing EVER

This is also the longest thing I have ever written in MY LIFE. This post has been compiled by the many emails I have received over the years from wives, girlfriends, boyfriends, fiancées, partners, and significant others.




Yeah, it's a long post, but it should be required reading for you and your significant other.

Well done Hannah!

Saturday, April 16, 2022

And So It Begins – Patient Task Email No. 0

I’ve currently got 51 days to go until my special day is here.....
And, just what happens in 51 days?   You'll just have to read Kelly's post to get the answer, and it's all good!  Oh, and this girl is absolutely gorgeous, as you can tell from the photo that goes with her post.


Thursday, April 14, 2022

Interview with Dusty Rose Smith

Monika: There must be many transgirls dreaming of becoming fashion models. I am too old for this but I know many girls that would be great models but they will never try being a model because of their innate feeling that they are not perfect beauties. Did you have the same feeling?


Monika does a nice interview with gorgeous trans fashion model, Dusty Rose Smith.  You'll find the answer to the question, above, along with many more in this blog post.

Sunday, April 10, 2022


I have held off writing this post because it concerns someone I love dearly: my son



I read this post and just said to!  The post is written by a loving father, and that's all I'm going to say.  You NEED to read this one.

Monday, April 4, 2022

......perhaps one of the best photos of me, simply because of the context. I love the idea of the female model, the male photographer, and the fact that the woman… me





Oh, you must see this post, from Sara!  The photos are awesome, as are her comments.  Just a wonderful blog post!

Thursday, March 31, 2022

My sexuality

Deeply repressed in my twenties, so ashamed of cross-dressing that I had aversion therapy, not knowing my own feelings, I wanted a girlfriend like a repressed gay man might- to make me normal, to make me appear normal. I believe a woman fell in love with me at University, saw the gentle soul below the layers of terror and arrogance, and took years to recover. I did not see it.

This is one of those brutally honest posts and well worth reading.  My apologies to Clare for posting this so late.

Thursday, March 24, 2022

Wigging Out

Recently I wrote a post which detailed a few of my trials and tribulations I experienced with wigs before I was able to grow my own hair to a feminine length


Here's the link to Cyrsti's original post.  In the most recent post, Cyrsti features Connie's comments on wigs.  Both are good reading.

Thursday, March 17, 2022

Ten Years Later…..

Realistically, if that hadn’t happened, I would probably still not have been abroad at any point, and from a trans perspective, I still probably wouldn’t have even started, whereas I type this having been post-op for about three and a half years. That’s still crazy to even think about.

It's been a while since we've seen a post from Kate.  Ten years ago, something happened that changed many things in Kate's life.  Go to Ten Years Later to find out just what happened.

Sunday, March 13, 2022

To distinguish

The elective taking up of gender variance in adulthood is something I cannot relate to but I know it exists.


It's one of Joanna's typically short posts, that says a lot.  I have known a few who claim not to have discovered that they are trans until well into their adult life.  A couple of those have fully transitioned.


Friday, March 11, 2022

The strange lens

As I was getting ready the other night, I had one of those moments of why am I doing this? That sightly off-centre thought that makes you question what’s going on. It’s all the…. malarkey and faffing about. A close shave, packing a bag, strapping in to shapewear, painting my face various colours, and then putting on fake hair. It’s all a bit…. confusing at times.


With the paragraph, above, along with the following paragraph, Lynn had me rolling on the floor (figuratively speaking) laughing.  Yes, she did finish getting ready and has a few brief comments on her evening.

Tuesday, March 8, 2022

The Angel Known as My Wife

Did I hide this from her for almost 30 years?  Absolutely, but the truth of the matter I hid it from myself for almost 50 years.




This is just a lovely post, from Kandi.  If you're trans and married, or have a partner, it should always mean compromise on the part of both partners.  Do read The Angle Known as My Wife.

Sunday, March 6, 2022

Sunday and a relaxing time as Susan

Now every time I post something like this, I get people reaching out to me about me transitioning and that is not what this is about, I am not transitioning. What it is about is I have come to accept this part of me as an equal part of who I am and is just as important to me as my male self.


Susan shares her day with us and even included some photos!

Saturday, March 5, 2022

Interview with Lexi Schmidt

Monika: We all pay the highest price for the fulfillment of our dreams to be ourselves. As a result, we lose our families, friends, jobs, and social positions. Did you pay such a high price as well? What was the hardest thing about your coming out?


Monika has done it again with a series of really good questions directed to her guest, Lexi Schmidt, a 40 year old transwoman who began her transition in 2017.

Wednesday, March 2, 2022

A story I shared with my Therapist last year

It was one of my last sessions with her and we sat facing each other in her office and she asked me her last question.

"Have you ever regretted being a male...when you look back are there any regrets?"

I told her "no, I never had any regrets presenting male."

I then explained my answer to her.

This is a Way Back Wednesday post from 2011.  You can read Annah's explanation here.  Anna stopped posting in August, 2011, but you should check out her blog.  Lots of very good posts.

Tuesday, March 1, 2022

Study of trans adolescents confirms puberty blockers and HRT are associated with improved mental health

Transition helps trans youth survive. Studies like these provide evidence that constrains what “child abuse” looks like in an environment where that important notion is all too often misused by the baseless, antiscientific and overreaching policy dictates of the Texas state government and beyond. And these are not the outcomes of abusers.

I'm always interested in any studies on transgender youth.  Puberty blockers can save lives.  Go here to read more.

Monday, February 28, 2022

The question still dogging me “which side is stronger?”

Over the years, I’ve seen and read many online friends and others, slowly creep along the change spectrum; crossdresser, gender fluid, trans woman. “That will ever happen to me”…but now I see so many similar patterns developing. 

Michelle asks the question, "which side is stronger?"  Although she doesn't mention "the slippery slope", it does make me wonder just what the science is behind the progression she describes in the paragraph, above.

Friday, February 25, 2022


I kind of felt sad about it every time I opened the draw realizing this purse-come-wallet that I really like was just not getting used. Several years on it was still in perfect condition, its puffiness with the material pleated at the edges and the silver embroidered writing still glistening brightly with femininity. 




This post is all about a lovely purse that sat unused for years, and some of you may guess why.  Enjoy Hannah's writing style and do read down to the last paragraph, which is short, but profound!

Thursday, February 24, 2022

3-year HRT Anniversary

I take my estrogen to live. I inject myself with a couple-inch needle once every two weeks in a ritual that goes from "no big deal, get it over with" to "um, procrastinate a day or two?".


It's been three years on HRT for Shannyn.  Go here to see how she's doing.


Wednesday, February 23, 2022

The Wardrobe

I must say I have never been in such a close proximity to so high a concentration of woman’s evening wear all in one place - that is without getting funny looks from department store assistants. 



Imagine that you're spending the night in a friend's house.  They offer you a nice room that just happens to have a wardrobe full of lovely evening dresses.  What would you do?  

Abigale shares such an experience with us.  What did Abi do?  Read The Wardrobe for the answer.

It seems that Abi hasn't posted to her blog in a few years.  It's nice to see her back.  Your comments will encourage more posts, so leave Abi a note.

Thursday, February 17, 2022

Father of transgender woman adopts her trans female friend

Grace Hyland posted this video about her transgender friend...



These are two lucky girls!

Tuesday, February 15, 2022

It's not polite when you get it wrong

Nothing sends me sideways faster than a hearty "sir!" from the other side of the line when I answer the phone.


For FtM transitioners, with the help of some T, the male voice emerges.  Not so for those transitioning from male to female. It's very difficult to achieve a feminine voice.  Transwomen must resort to voice training (I've tried it) or surgery.  Since vocal cord surgery is still iffy, most will take lessons to develop a feminine voice which, with practice, can be fairly successful.

This post is not about voice training or surgery however, so click on the link to find out just what our blogger has to say.

Thursday, February 10, 2022

Marriage, Again!

We might all love a happy ending, but what about a new beginning.. oh yes, we love those too!! 

Read all the details in Marriage, Again at Kelly's Unordinary Style. 

Thursday, February 3, 2022

Groundhog day

This is now the tenth anniversary of my voyage to the south coast clinic where the repairs and modification, which I was told fifty years ago would not be possible in my lifetime, were finally undertaken. That arrogant doctor was wrong…

From Deanna:

My girlfriend "Caroline" has posted on the tenth anniversary of her visit to the 'spa' in Brighton. It might be her last contribution here in Blogistan. We shall see.

Do stop by and read Groundhog Day and let her know, by visiting, that you were there. Read a few more of her posts keeping in mind that her comment stream isn't working. 

If you leave a comment for her on Deanna's blog, she can read and reply. I will leave this up for a long while for that purpose.

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