A Smile That Could Light up a Room

"What really impressed me about my friend was just how happy she is."

Our blog-mistress Calie has posted for the second time in the same number of months. 

This post is a gem; about one's struggle for life and the importance of friends when you are transsexual. 

Calie and I had much more in common only a few years ago, but she is doing what most of us cannot; staying the course and maintaining her façade. If you are in a similar place, you know how hard that is. She is an amazing person who opens up in this post about spending an hour or so, over a couple of beers, with a friend from work who has transitioned recently. 

"While sipping on our brews, we discussed topics that only those who understand the agony of living life in the body of a male, when we both should have been born female, can relate to.  Our conversation went in and out of those dark places that both of us and, indeed, any transsexual has fallen into during their pre-transition life."

Head on over to read more of Calie's  A Smile That Could Light up a Room.

Trans with the Quakers

We have hugged. We have expressed our sorrow for the falling out, and our forgiveness for each other, and Ruth asks me if, on the hormones, it might be right to say that- trans women are like teenage girls?





Clare relates a few conversations she has had with the Quakers, her chosen religion.  The response would appear to be favorable to a point and much better than many other religions.  Expressing emotions as a woman, or in this case a transwoman, is also discussed.  As is always the case, an interesting post, from Clare.

The New Me

I felt euphoric when I started taking hormones, but there was nothing that could have prepared me for this level of happiness. I looked in the mirror and my body just made sense. It was hard to fall in love with it at first, with two tubes and gauze packing inside, but it was mine.









I want to introduce you to Maddie.  I work with Maddie.  I've known her for several years but I never knew she was trans until she transitioned at work.  I recently also found out that Maddie is a blogger and I've never had her blog listed on T-Central, until now.  

She's a wonderful writer and I especially want to point out two posts that meant a lot to me:  The New Me, is Maddie's most recent post where she describes her gender confirmation surgery.  Say Yes to the Dress is a post where Maddie describes her first steps outside as a woman.  Every post is worth reading, but do check out these two.  You may also note that there's a common theme throughout Maddie's blog and that's Megan, Maddie's very loving and supportive wife.  Grab a cup of coffee or tea and take a few moments to check out this wonderful blog.

Pink and blue

Earlier this week I caught a video from a training event at work. The presenter - a trans person - was going through the terminology on their slide deck. We run through trans-woman, trans-man, and along the wordage. We get to the cloud of terms where I'd probably sit: gender variant, cross-dresser. I hear on the audio track "...these people aren't really trans." I hit the pause button and stop to consider things.


A corporate training video, with this comment?  It's simply wrong.  Lynn has a few comments.

A State-less Pride

Having parsed the preliminaries, let me get to the meat of the May 16 guidance:  the Department of State will not be sending a cable encouraging U.S. Missions to engage in outreach to lgbt+ communities on IDAHOT or during Pride Month this year.



This post from Robyn, a long-time blogger and US State Department employee, is just not what we want to hear.....

Week 4-7 Post-GCS

Sitting down still f***g hurts. Standing around for too long f***g hurts. Stubbing my toe when walking f***g hurts and sometimes just walking f***g hurts. Jogging or running is still out of the f***g question.





You know I like updates!  Here's another post GCS post, from Heather.  I think our girl has a sense of humor.....at least I hope she does!  Hang in there, girl.  My friends have all told me it gets better.  

Starting electrolysis

I do not want to make a fool of myself, to be mocked or ridiculed or rejected, nor do I want to be pressured into moving forwards if it does not feel right for me, or pressure others into being okay with me when this is the first time they will see me in female clothing, I do not want to damage the relationships I have – it will literally be two nights and one full day of many of those little daydreams about coffee and lunches and window shopping and dancing and being seen as a woman in public that I have had literally had for basically my entire teenage and adult life coming true....


The paragraph, above, is from the end of Dee's current post.  I so get how she feels.  Starting electrolysis, however, is not about her first time out but rather about her laser and electrolysis treatments and the amazing Magic Cream, which she explains in her blog post.

Transition & The Loss of Friends

........how many friends have I lost due to transitioning?  Ummmm...... maybe two.  A married couple that my wife and I would hang with on occasion.  Yup.  I had my suspicions about whether or not the lack of contact from them was due to my transition.  Recently I met with the wife of the couple and it was pretty much confirmed that they have stopped wanting to hang out with us due to my transition.  Sad?  Yes.  Yes it is very sad to me that both my wife and I have lost them as friends due to me choosing to be true to who I have been born as.


Everything Nadine writes is reality, and comes from the heart.  In this one, she talks about Transition and the Loss of Friends.  It hasn't been a big issue for Nadine, but when you do transition, you find out who your real friends are, and it's clear the two mentioned above were not in that group.

Ask Hannah’s Wife

How do you feel about Hannah when she’s… um… Hannah?







 

What a fantastic blog post, from Hannah!  Hannah's wife agreed to answer your questions.  For the answer to the question, above, and others, go to Ask Hanah's Wife.

A spell of calm

It was a moment of contentment. Those, I think, are to be enjoyed when they occur. There was no worry about the future; no concern at what had happened; no remorse, guilt, or upset: just, well, being okay with who I was.




I really, really liked this comment, from Lynn; written after a fun night with her local trans group.

I decided to stop taking testosterone, for now

Two days ago, I abruptly hit a wall in my transition journey.  But it’s more like that wall had a secret corridor that I’m now turning down, without really slowing down – just taking a moment to look back, and all around me, and then moving on in this other direction.




Why go off Testosterone?  Go here, for this update from JQ to find out.

the rocky road

Those who pass are fortunate because they can most often fall under the radar. They may have transitioned young or perhaps have sufficiently feminine physical attributes to be left alone. But even they, once they come out or are outed, can face harsh discrimination at the hands of a society who doesn’t understand them and perhaps refuses to.


Unfortunately, discrimination against those who are transgender still exists, and I don't see it going away anytime soon.  Joanna has a few things to say about this.

Y does not necessarily equal M: On what intersex people can tell us about gender identity

“Most people assume that you’re biologically either a man or a woman, but it’s actually a lot more complex than that. There are so many ways somebody could be intersex. 

In my case, it means I was born with XY chromosomes, which you probably know as male chromosomes. And I was born with a vagina and balls inside my body. I don’t respond to testosterone, so during puberty, I grew breasts… I don’t actually have a uterus – I was born without one, so I don’t menstruate, I can’t have biological children…"

The quote, above from Emily Quinn, is included in this excellent post from Jack Molay.  Please grab a cub of coffee or tea, sit back, and take the time to read this post.

Ask Hannah’s…Wife

We know what it is like to be us.  We know how complex, stressful, conflicting, and wonderful it is to be who we are.  Sharing this side of us is not easy and I do my best to write about what our partners may be feeling, thinking, or worried about when it comes to being in a relationship with someone like us.







I always appreciate any posts dealing with the relationship between someone who is trans and their spouse.  This one is from Hannah, and she invites your questions.

Wearing A Denim Skirt After 40

I love the denim skirt and it is a wardrobe stable.  Nothing can hug your body better because of it's weight and can be cut in so many different ways. The problem, if not done correctly, you come across a pretending to be a middle-age-teen.  



I always appreciate Rhonda's fashion advice.  This time, it's about denim skirts....for those of us over 40.

A Change in Perspective

“All right then Matthew,” she continues, still quite loudly going out of her way to say my first name, “If you will please provide all of the highlighted information on this form, I’ll get you all checked in!”  By now of course, all four of the other guests and another hotel employee are all staring at me. I honestly don’t think that she was trying to be a witch, I think that she was just being thoughtless.


Kimberly thinks she has had problems passing as of late.  I think she looks fab!  Regardless, the hotel clerk, seeing Kimberly's given name on the registration, seems to need some sensitivity training.

Conversion by Debbie Lawrence (transgender fiction)

Conversion therapy as a "so-called" cure for the non-diseases of homosexuality and gender variance has long been invalidated by such august institutions as The American Psychological Association, among others.


Here's a short book review from Sally. It's fiction and sounds like an interesting read.